Thursday, December 31, 2009


Are your children any better off for the Christmas gifts they have received?

Are they more content?


Less in want?

More at peace with themselves and their siblings?

Are they better people?

For that matter, are YOU?

Tuesday, December 8, 2009


I am.

It's ridiculous.

I sat down to write about it, pray about it, in my journal this morning. I confessed my sins and asked Jesus to take away my greed. I usually write in a jumbled flurry of thoughts and then go back and pray what I've written. What I noticed as I did this struck me as funny. Ha-ha funny even. I am such a visual person that God very often deals with me in ways that I can see, and I love Him for it. As I looked at my journal page, I noticed a pattern. The first word on the left-hand column of more than fifty percent of the lines I'd written was


I could almost feel the heat of the light bulb, people. It was shining brightly, directly over my head. I am discontent because my focus is


Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:1-2

Thursday, December 3, 2009

This is the day

It's the second anniversary of my mom's death.

I was really sad on Monday, and on Tuesday when I sat up late and read through all the journal entries I wrote during the last month of her life. Today Sadness is here but seems to be resting. Like she's long claimed her home in my heart but has finally decided to unpack boxes and hang pictures. Sadness in comfy slippers. The idea of Sadness being a part of me is interesting. It makes sense. Just like my mom will always be a part of me, so will be her loss.

I asked Jesus to tell her that I miss her. I don't think it's convoluted theology to think He will do it. God is so clearly a God of relationships, and relationships don't end in death. At least not for those of us who have secured eternity by trusting in Jesus' death and resurrection.

And with that knowledge, I think even Sadness is smiling.